Perfect

I turned another leaf,
a quarter is torn but it's still good

I forgot my pain
but a scar I couldn't hide from you

this skin is weakened,
getting bitter with every iron it sheds.

your kiss was bliss,
but I kept on dreaming.

When I woke up you were gone,
away to some work you've decided before.

It must be good,
to be busy of some sort.

I turned another leaf,
I think this time it is perfect,

but all along, it was.

First Sonnet

Said a picture speaks of a thousand words,
yet still a thousand words I have to write.
Beneath her songs are the beautiful chords,
but love is not what she seeks in spite.

Caressing souls, deceiving perceptions,
of course none could face against the richest.
Weddings and more meaningless receptions,
and some more lives taken by the tempest.

Peace is something I was never born for,
it was something that I learned by heart.
And know for what pleasures I seek before,
left nothing but a world falling apart.

Time may have all the answers but not mine,
for it is found when life and death align.

Last Stand

Stop being a coward,
go and take your reward.

Life's not hide and seek.
You don't always have to be meek.

Understand love, it isn't to be foretold.
Stand your life, stand as no paper fold.

Now you realize, you're alone,
and in happiness you're gone.

Take a deeper breath,
dive into a shallow death.

None would want to struggle,
but life is more than to stumble.

Wake up and be steadfast.
There's more to do than to just last.

Today is harsh,
but tomorrow isn't yet.

Alright

Nobody is alright.
As my fate ripped me apart,

apart from my own home,
from my own love.

As others have felt it too.
I couldn't even fight back.

No, I think I don't need to.
All the love that I knew I had,

are they just pretty illusions? A dream,
that I someday have to wake up from.

Or is this life a nightmare, the
one we can never escape from?

Easy to say it, I don't normally complain.
I just tether all the thoughts and feelings,

craft them anew and
carve them aside.

All the pain and all the prayers,
won't they fit together in a circle?

Someday you'll see,
I was never alright.

I don't want to be alright.
I'm afraid if I found out that I'm

the only one who's alright.
I'll be alone and I can't be with you.

Confused

Many, many things there are
that I need to clean up before dawn.

Where's the glory in waiting?
Patience only gave me too little strength.

Just why I never understand,
I have things that I need by heart.

But my heart just choose not to,
it seems to be frozen in time.

I no longer believe, I no longer
feel. I am just this once unsure.

But I don't understand how, just
how bad could this be? Love?

To me

What would be of tomorrow?
I would never know.

The moonlight was taken from me.
And among the clouds there's not a silver lining.

Why is it painful to be apart?
I already know how to live alone.

Do we always struggle in love,
is it just a natural thing to feel?

She is so lovely I can't deny it,
and now her smile is so clear I just can't let go of it.

Is there any way to keep it?
Maybe, but not that I know of.

I hope time understands me,
because time is my only hope.

If she'd like to,
I'll go anywhere with her.

Because yesterday the universe danced,
and the skies carried her to me.

End of 2014

Counting down the days down this year,
learned quite a few but more than ever.

Christmas has passed by the door,
thinking about the present, but not the ones on the floor.

Since long I've already missed my homeland,
but I can't retreat with nothing on my hands.

So you think you know "life",
truth is all we ever knew was "survive".

Under this cold, endless rain,
who cares enough to see the pain?

I nearly thought that everybody was crying,
but I can't be sure if it wasn't just the skies, pouring.

As I grow wiser and my views widen,
all my sorrow will no longer be a burden.

Yet I can't write like last time,
when nothing comes to mind,
the poet broke the rhyme,
and let the letters unbind.

Love and Poetry

I know, I know.
I've been in love too, many times in a row.

Listen to their whispers,
seek within and without what should be there between lovers.

Have you found it?
I can't say I did.

I mean, look at the roses.
Can't feel the thorns before you bleed.

Nothing wrong with kisses.
Just some little painkillers that you need.

Long before I love,
I knew words are my sharpest sword.

A sword I keep forging,
as more words I keep forgetting.

Poetry, is not about the words you use.
It's about the words you can no longer use.

Words I can no longer use because they hurt so much,
Yet I keep finding other words that could replace them.

Poetry's like love,
just not that serious.

Litany of a Broken Heart

But don't blame anyone,
since this heart isn't mine,
not anymore.

I knew my heart, it wasn't like this,
it had no cracks
nor chipping parts.

It was beautiful
much,
much
more
than the mess I never thought it could be.

I wanted to tell you how to love,
but now it's been too late.

So later, would you listen?
No, Not me.
Don't listen to me.

Listen to that sound instead.
Sound of the broken pieces, falling apart.

Hitting the tip of the abyss
like a thousand raindrops,
landing on the concrete road.

A beautiful sound,
more than most
that I've ever heard.

As I listened, I'm glad
it wasn't somebody else's.

I knew it had no cracks,
nor chipping parts.

Sun

Is it the comfort that I give
because I'll never leave you?

Maybe you'll figure out how to do things by yourself;
maybe I'll figure out how to travel by myself.

I loved you like how these hands wanted to hold the sun;
that no matter how hard people laugh at it,

no matter how impossible,
it is still the warmth that I dreamt of.

Be it absurd, I would still love to hold the sun.
Because in the end I'm the one who's holding my dreams.

Not those people.
None of them.

Hometown

Chattering of this room,
suddenly I miss the sunrise in my hometown.

Glancing at a few drops of morning dew,
while listening to the church bells ringing from afar.

Wouldn't the birds sing hence they see each other?
I was stuck in my computer nevertheless.

Looking for answers to the questions,
questions I didn't want to answer but

now they have brought me far, far away from home.
Which made me think in deeper a sense,

was this happiness the one I was looking for?
But I guess everyone would ask that.

I eventually knew that, no one can give you the answer.
You have to construct that on your own.

You know, in the end I didn't finish my answer.
Once I look back, I kind of see that:

the morning dew still would have dropped
as the church bells rang, and the birds still sang.

Suddenly I missed the sunrise in my hometown.
I am stuck in my computer nevertheless.

Detached

Days have passed,
I stride without sight.

And I found my coin,
that long ago I buried within.

The carved words are like a memento,
of the notes that vanished in a concerto.

I have to sing when it's the right time,
or else I'll forget everything that's mine.

I kind of love you,
but looking at those stars, I soon forget about you.

Sorry if I don't actually like being a human,
but anyway, I get to know things I wouldn't notice if I weren't.

Life is so beautiful now that I remember,
I could have died before I could even remember.

So here again I'd like to get some lines,
right from the cheerful side of mine.

And I know it's not always great to live,
but I guess it's kind of great just to be alive.

Self

Why are we so sure of ourselves;
and again in words we try to describe.
See how they are left, in vain again.

All the statements in our minds are yet to be dangerous,
which I always hope I could just release myself from.

Things we know by heart, can never be lingually spoken.

There's no need to try so much,
There's no need to try at all.

Untouchable

Beauty lies in immediacy,
Still untouchable.

Obscene, yet unchangeable.
it is purely striking.

Yet it feels closer than
never far away from

It challenges everyone,
and leave them torn apart.

A curse,
and an evil.

An angel,
and a blessing.

It tortured its participants,
and let no one win.

Be careful will you,
and stay calm.

Take a distance from it,
owners and spectators.

our hearts and
everything else.

Both

How I wish
I can see both sides

darkness of the night,
and the light of day.

I have the body that binds me so
to the leniency of humanity.

To be true, I am a son of the sun,
yet a servant of the moon.

Therefore, I don't stay in one path,
nor in another.

I disagreed to everything,
but I agreed to changes.

The changes,
they were all that I believed in.

The most beautiful time of day,
is indeed when it changes,

between day and darkness,
as between night and light.

Belief

Believe me, I don't even need love.
It disperses in this blood I carry.

It doesn't mean you're wrong,
I'm the one at fault.

I would use truth for my own,
throw it away when it's unworkable.

I believe that's what I naturally do to people as well.
I thought for their happiness, but it was for my own.

I don't want to be somebody else,
so I kept changing myself.

But I know nothing of direction,
and again I ran around, in circle.

I was a friend to anyone,
but always a burden for everyone.

Still, I can't hope for things to go right,
while I myself hasn't done any so.

If there's anything I can't do,
it's because I never believe in myself.

Believe me, I never do.
People believe in me, but I never do.

Time

Isn't it time that always binds us?

Tells us to give up, but we never do.

Tells us to wake up, to sleep.

Eat and drink, maybe not anymore.

Sometimes I'd like to imagine,

how our life would be without time?

While time itself is a precious gift,

it's both our curse and burden alike.

Maybe I can ignore time,

for it is what makes us finite and weak.

Or conquer it, but how?

As every year I was never able to.

I never want to know how anymore.

But maybe it isn't so bad at all.

Without time, we could have never existed.

Still is it a worthless thought?

For all that lives, time has given a chance.

Melancholy or not, we had to know.

Our existence here is never by chance,

Time has promised us this life,

and only time would take it back from us.

and if there's anyone who would misjudge you,

it is nothing much, really.

Because only the last judgement matters,

and the last judgement stands only in the hands of Time.

Morning

You're like a short addiction to my boring nightmare,
as I did see myself as another sometimes.

Take a step on, think.
Do something.

I don't meditate much lately.
But at least today I managed to greet the sun earlier.

I've thought of working.
But I haven't yet.

Could it be that wisdom is not eternal,
so sometimes I have to renew it.

I don't need a vacation.
What I need is a truth well said.

Sleep

I'm tired of being weak, far from what I have inside.
Still I am weak, and I don't know how to stop being so.

Does being good at something really cost a thousand days?
If so, I am just being impatient, am I not?

Do I ever care about what I will give everyday?
I care more about what I will get everyday instead.

Knowing a problem doesn't always solve it.
But isn't ignorance what I despise the most?

I hate to question everything,
yet I hate being so sure of everything.

I know I've lived with contradictions, so I made peace with it.
So tell me why wouldn't you?

People out there despise contradictions in others,
while they are in fact ignorant to their own contradictions.

And we stand with all the reasons we have,
against all the fears we despise of.

To proof that we are good,
but still bad.

Not Tomorrow

I work faster because I am lazy.
I know more because I always doubt myself.
I never give up because I never succeed.
I think about what I choose to think.

I stay silent when I listen. They are using the same letters for a reason.
Words are powerful, but their roots are in thyself.

For wisdom is a mountain, you'll have to climb by yourself.
Borrowing stories from hikers doesn't make you one.

As in poetry and books, we love because we don't know.
And just when we think we know, love slowly fades into acceptance.

I always doubt myself, so that my love for things never stops.
But it seems all of these are immature.

So I have to throw them away.
To live today, and not tomorrow.